My World

Joel and I are heading up to Oregon on Thursday. We wont be there long - we come back on Saturday - but I'm a little anxious about seeing Dad. Grandma and Grandpa are insisting that we stay with them, and Grandma assures me that Dad has been told that he isn't to come to the house unless he clears it with me.

As much as I'd rather not, I know I have to see him. I plan on going over there at some point on the Thursday, with Joel, getting it over and done with, and then spending Friday with Grandma and Grandpa. And then Joel and I are meeting with Hannah, whom I have known since I was seven, and going to dinner with her and her new man, Josh. She's a suuuper cool chick and we always hang out whenever I make it back to town.

I have no idea what I'm gonna say to Dad. I'm also nervous about what he's gonna say about the engagement. I mean, nothing he could say would change a thing, but I don't want him giving Joel a hard time about not asking his permission. Fact is, I asked him, a couple months ago, not to ask Dad's permission whenever the time came, because I'm no longer his.

I asked Missa whether she wanted me to tell him anything, but she doesn't have anything to say to him. I'm not sure she'll ever recover from this... and I can't say that I blame her. She always finds it hard to forgive, whether it's something as huge as this or something as little as a stupid argument with Daniel. It's just her nature.

Serena has given me a letter to give to him. I've no idea what it says. Mom wants me to tell him that he can have the house, and also that she wont stop him seeing Serena, should Serena ever want to see him. And that's about all.